May 18, 2010 7:03 AM

ephemeral stability



Someone once wrote to me wishing that I, "had a chance to take in the last remains of the cherry blossoms that are falling...that is, before they turn into leaves [and noted how] it's funny [that] those cherry blossoms... are beautiful for a few days, and then, that's it."

This many sound quite out of context and difficult to understand if you haven't observe blooming Japanese cherry trees in April. To be honest, even I did not understand what he meant at that time. What's more ironic, I passed by hundreds of blossoming cherry trees on my way to Tohoku University each morning I biked to school!

Was he insinuating that happiness only lasts for a brief moment? Or maybe that the game is over even though it barely started? Or could it possibly be that we are both like the characters in Street Fighter? That maybe we only have a limited amount of time to showcase our martial arts skills to stay in the game a little bit longer than the rest, before we too are both knock out of the race.



Does every aspect about life revolve around the metaphor, "Out, out brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more," in Act 5, scene 5 of Macbeth? Though I've tried to contemplate and analyze both these writings on multiple occasions, I always felt defeated each time because the bigger pictures of their stories were too heavy and deep for me to understand. But that was a couple weeks ago.

Now, life is starting to become like a collection of tiny, pink and white sakura petals gently floating in the air whenever a breeze passes by. For a brief moment in time, I'm taken out of the chaos of this world and given the opportunity to enjoy the simple beauty of nature. Somehow I falsely develop a feeling that there is nothing to worry about as the peacefulness of the petals fills the air and consumes my thoughts. Unfortunately like many other aspects of life, this feeling only lasts for a few seconds and soon all the flowers have fallen to the ground. I try to convince myself that it is always better to be happy, feel at peace and love others (even if that happiness only lasts for a couple months, or weeks, or days, or even minutes) and then deal with the consequences when those feelings are taken away; than to not feel anything at all. But the ever growing practical part of my mind makes this goal so difficult to achieve...

I wonder whether I should really call it a blessing that I am given the opportunity to be expose to new places and faces that broaden my horizons and entertain my curiosity. Because when they're gone, very few tangible objects can fill in the void that's left behind... Although this disturbing thought confused and challenged my impulsive and ingenuous personality, I need to thank it for forcing me to become more aware of the little details in life while analyzing the main idea to come up with a feasible and productive solution.

Long story short, I recently had a eureka moment- if you can really call it eureka. Although the blooming period for sakura is very short, I can take solace in the fact that more sakura will bloom next year, and the year after that. I just gotta' have faith that natural disasters and human mistakes won't destroy the trees. No matter what happens in the future, I still can control the present. It is possible to maintain some sense of control by reminding myself that I need to make the most of every day and simply enjoy life.

I think I deserve a gold star sticker for realizing this. Hmm, on second thoughts, I'll settle for just a few more minutes under a flowering cherry tree...

Amelia Nguyen | Permalink | Comment on this article | Comments (0)

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